This is the WORST basement you’ve ever seen.

My friend says to me, “OMG, this tastes disgusting. TRY IT.” And I do. And she’s right. It’s completely disgusting. Why on Earth do we do that? Who knows. No one said humanity makes sense all the time. Or even half the time.

But that’s not a subject I’m touching on today…not even with a ten-foot pole, as they say. Here’s something else that I shouldn’t touch with a ten-foot pole…

my basement.

You wanna see something disgusting? OF COURSE YOU DO, right?!

Take a deep breath…we are about to walk through the gates of my own, personal hell.

Aaaggghhh! the boob light! the linoleum! the blue walls (not to even mention the obscene amount of dust)…

When we first bought this house, whenever I’d open the door to the basement, “Thriller” would immediately pop into my head. “It’s close to midnight and something evil’s lurking in the dark…under the boob light you see a sight that almost stops your heart,” 

“You try to scream, but all that wood paneling stops the sound before you make it…”

You start to freeze as the horror of this basement hits you right between the eyes, you’re paralyzed…”

Yep. Paralyzed is probably the best term for what we felt when we looked at tackling this space.

Paralyzed. “And no one was gonna save us from this beast about to strike…we were fighting for our life inside a killer…” Killer basement. That’s what we are dealing with here. And CLEARLY not killer in any good way.

See the gross-ness in the shot above? No, I don’t mean the linoleum…although that’s pretty nasty too. I mean the blackness on the wall? Mold. YUP, mold behind the baseboards.

And this was eerily reminiscent of that one time, in our dining room, when I ripped off the chair rail and found something a bit scary. Then we ripped MORE down, molding, drywall, you name it, and found THIS…

You’re a lucky ducky if that shot doesn’t immediately draw within you a scream of utter horror and shock. Prior to buying this house, I would have been blissfully unaware of what we’re looking at right there as well. But now, I’m MUCH older, and at least a little wiser.

That, my friends, is termite damage (insert that maniacal laugh of Vincent Price from Thriller HERE). And I gotta tell you, I am out of my mind nervous about what we’re going to find behind these moldy baseboards here in the basement. Because where there’s water damage, there can also be termite damage.

Sooooooo….if someone happens to know some stellar meditation, self-calming techniques, breathing strategies…or just happens to have some extra Xanax lying around that they feel they could spare….message me, and I’ll send you my address (joking. sort of).

Because this ain’t lookin so hot, folks. But we’re pretty tough cookies, so this basement can bring its worst. We’re ready.

And truth be told, we’ve already started on the space. The basement is made up of a large family room/recreation room area, a bathroom, and a guest room. We’ve already finished the stairs, guest room, and bathroom. I’ll share those through this One Room Challenge process, as well. But this makeover is focused purely on the basement rec room. And trust me, after this makeover, we’re gonna need all the REC we can get. Because for a while here, it’s gonna be nothing but a WRECK.

If you aren’t scared away by now, CONGRATULATIONS! You made it through the horror show! We’ll be back next week to share DEMOLITION. For those people out there who may have an affinity for wood paneling. I’m just gonna warn you now. You will despise us next week.

Want to skip to the end of the book and see how this book ends?